July 2021 – lee-lawmaster.com

The Flora Bama Run

The next day we made a run to Florida, in the section I was informed is called florabama by the locals, due to it being directly south of Alabama. It was an adventure for certain.

Our first stop was in Panama City Beach, and not for the beach. We went there to see a person I treasure, a person I look up to, a person who moved away years ago to which I said that I would see if I was ever in the area again.

We had some hiccups due to the loss of the wallet however, something they told me over the phone wouldn’t be an issue. I have to go on a bit of a rant about the hotel we stayed at before I get on with this post however.

Under any and all circumstances DO NOT stay at the Boardwalk Beach Hotel. FULL STOP. I refuse to link to it, but it is on all of the typical hotel booking sites. I only got the room because it was the cheapest one I could find, and Hotel 6 was charging $500 a night. At $390 a night, I was expecting to find some comfort after a long day on the road, but that was only after I went through their gauntlet of horrors. The line to check in was about 100 feet long, and while their convention space seemed nice, the hotel rooms were the polar opposite. The lady at the desk was extremely rude to us, giving obvious examples that she had no cares about our unique situation (my wallet being taken by an alligator). They required I provide a different credit card, even though I had already fully paid for the room with one I had lost. They then stated that I would receive a refund on my first card within 10 days. I didn’t, and reported this to both of my credit card companies – who were very displeased.

But I got to have dinner with my friend. She hadn’t seen Amelia in a few years, I had been telling her about how much she had grown, but she got to see my tales with her own eyes. I was first introduced to her by another friend who did all of the music for a movie she had just finished. Dad was still with us back then, and the local connection was invaluable to me. I thought she and dad would become instant friends, and he could be invaluable to her in her work in the visual arts.

We then tried to get some rest, all four of us in the double beds we were provided. We were unsuccessful in our quest, but arose to something beautiful the next morning.

My girlfriend finally got some beach time. I could tell she was very happy in her soul.

I chose to stay in the room while the girls went down to the beach and played in the water. Before I knew it, it was check out time and we had another place to visit before we made our way back to defend New Orleans. So I went down to the beach to collect my wayward girls, pack up and hit the road.

Before we left PCB, we had to make a few stops though. Amelia wanted to go to Ron Jons and Margaritaville to pick up some things. I only had Google Pay on my phone to purchase things – and it quit working. So it was all on Lyndsey, we walked out of Ron Jons with a $600 bill. I was shocked when I saw the receipt. Shocked I tell you. I swiftly returned snorkels that Lyndsey had picked up for the girls – they were $100 by themselves.

After a long, and arduous drive across the panhandle of Florida, we made it to our second destination, Pensacola Beach. We drove there to see Lyndsey’s half sister, whom she had never met before. I was pretty amazed at her home, on one side is the ocean and beach, on the other side is the inlet, and behind their house is a channel for boats.

We sat and talked for a while, where I just wanted to sleep. Unfortunately I didn’t get the chance to do that. Both Kira and Amelia kayaked down the channel with Lyndsey’s nephew. Amelia took some prying to do it, but eventually gave in.

We then went to the inlet, where Kira was swimming while under the watchful eye of her cousin. We stayed to watch the sunset, it was pretty breathtaking.

We then scuttled off to Peg Leg Pete’s, a beach/island bar & restaurant. It was a hit with everyone.

I attempted to drive us home, but had to give up not too long into the trip. I was just too tired to really drive. So Lyndsey took the helm, and she did it well on this trip, driving about half way to our destination and the vast majority of the way back home. I’m really proud of the abilities her new car has provided her. Driving her old car was really a strain on her body.

Dr. Seuss Ate My Wallet

Not literally, but in a way. In actuality, an alligator did. But I’ll get to that later.

After our day at the museum, we got organized and made some plans we both couldn’t cancel and had hard timelines on. We were to have a day split with time in the French Quarter and on a Swamp Tour, something a friend of mine had told me many times to do.

Since I had been to the French Quarter before, and we had some tight timelines, I decided it would be best to drive and park in the French Quarter. I found us a parking garage we could park in that was just a block away from Jackson Square, and pre-paid. We had this block of time, there was no going back. We decided that we were going to split up, each parent with their child. Go do things we wanted to do. But there was a slight hiccup, Lyndsey left her phone at the house, something we didn’t realize until we got there. To go back we would lose about an hour of time, so to hell with it.

Amelia and I instantly went to our place, Stanley. I didn’t get the picturesque photo that I got last time, but it’ll do.

We had our breakfast, and were on our way. When we came in 2019, we really didn’t do much. So we explored the French Quarter as much as we could. Stopping at many of the gift shops along the way. Google maps wasn’t of much help, as it kept changing orientation on me. So we made some disorganized criss cross motions around the southern end of the place.

We stopped at the Museum of Death, which was cool but nothing awe inspiring in my opinion. They do have David Koresh’s band shirt, which is pretty cool.

We then made our way to The Art of Dr. Seuss, part of the Angela King Gallery. It was a small space, but my eyes were in heaven. They had lots of pieces that I found highly interesting, but one stood above the rest. I found it curious as it had no price tag on it. It was from my favorite Seuss book, “Green Eggs & Ham.” I had to ask, I had to prod.

“Would you? Could You? In a Car?” Arabian Edition

It was apparently the only copy remaining for sale. I was told that any works where duplicates were made are all done in limited copies. The price they gave was something I could handle, and so I bought it. I had it shipped to my home, just receiving it a few days ago.

By this time, we were both getting hot and we needed some hydration. Trying to find a place where you and your underage daughter can sit down and drink something non-alcoholic in the French Quarter isn’t an easy task, but I found a Oyster Bar on Royal street that let me do just that. Amelia had water and Sprite while I had water and a Hurricane, because why not?

I then started getting messages from Lyndsey, via her watch. She kept telling me where she was, but I was not getting cross streets to get a proper location. It appeared that her and Kira had went the polar opposite direction as Amelia and I did. After some back and forth, I settled up and we made our way to find them. When I reached them, they were both hot, thirsty and hungry. I wanted to go to the Hard Rock Cafe earlier, but knew they were closed. So I thought we’d stop by there, grab some grub and then head to our next destination. By the time we made it there, we discovered that they didn’t serve food until 4pm.

So I decided we would cut our losses and get out of dodge, with the traffic in the quarter – we were pushing making it to our swamp tour. We drove to the nearest place everyone could agree on and/or eat at. I just drank copious amounts of fluids to re-hydrate myself.

We made it to the location of our swamp tour just in time. After getting our wristbands, we sat and waited until the boats were ready. Something had happened to the boat we were originally scheduled to use, which bothered Lyndsey, as the boat we were on was a little larger than the one we were to be on.

There were many warnings about either locking things in your car, or making sure they are zippered, as items have been known to get lost on these tours. We were going along, having a blast. We would stop in locations and our guide would throw out marshmallows and hotdogs. The alligators faces would soften up, and act like puppies that were trying to steal food from the table. It was adorable.

He then popped out a little stowaway, a baby alligator. Lyndsey felt like she was in heaven, and Amelia smiled – which is rare anymore. I refrained, but relished in their happiness.

Recall what I mentioned about things being lost? I had put everything but my wallet inside a zippered pocket of my shorts. Through all of the bumps and hits that you get on an airboat, my wallet slowly but surely slipped out of my back pocket. While we were sitting still, there was a noise on my side of the boat. Someone stated they thought it was a fish jumping out of the water, then someone else said, “no it’s that guys wallet.” I happened to be “that” guy. Just then, a large alligator came to the boat, coming right up to me.

Everyone thinks that gator ate my wallet. Our guide told me that the wallet was in about 5 feet of water, and that if he felt like there was a chance to retrieve it, he would have. He kept apologizing to me, but there wasn’t much that could be done. Sure, it dampened my spirits but there was nothing I could do about it. I just had to proceed forward and enjoy things as best I could.

I had fun on the swamp tour, but spent the rest of the time trying to figure out how I would get my credit cards, ID and other items I keep in my wallet back. This created a real situation for us the next day as I had booked us a hotel room in Panama City Beach so I could see a friend who had moved away.

When in Rome

I kept repeating this phrase when on our vacation. I’m not one to like normal tourist spots, do normal tourist things. Even when I am the tourist. The next day we planned on going to the French Quarter, do some exploring and some shopping. We woke up late and not feeling the best – but we sure had to do something. XY (That’s Christy for the uninitiated) told me that they just built a new children’s museum at City Park, so we went for it.

For those who have never been, City Park in New Orleans is amazing. I would go to New Orleans just to visit that park.

We started the way we started many of our days, with a visit to Café Du Monde, as they have a location at City Park that’s laid back, easy to access and hello did you even read the title?

After the beignets were consumed, we carried on to the Louisiana Children’s Museum. XY wasn’t wrong, the place was new and mighty interesting.

The kids and I had fun with these chairs, the fog is actually an art installation and provides a cooling effect

The building was made to be as earth friendly as possible, and it shows. I appreciated the thoughtfulness in the design.

Speaking of design, the main entry doors even have a door specifically made for children. It was adorable as it is thoughtful.

Kira felt embarrassed, but I thought it was the cutest thing in the world.

The main lobby is a little blah for my tastes, but once you get to the primary areas it’s a hit. The first floor didn’t have much that intrigued our 11 year old brewing drama queens except for a really awesome magnifying station. The rest of the space was more for the younger kiddies.

Next to this were shelves filled with jars of things to discover.

The design continued with the windows for the building, which is full of to let in natural light and help eliminate the need for heating systems. There are a few windows that are larger on the outside than on the inside, causing an opportunity for the photogenic mind.

We then went upstairs, where they had a “toy” replica of Jackson Square, a large bubble machine, a music room and a really fascinating recreation of the Mississippi river.

Someone could have a lot of fun with this and Photoshop

I really loved the umbrellas hanging in the air.

Their interpretation of the river was great for all ages. So much so, that the kids (ours included) got in trouble for attempting to flood New Orleans.

We then ventured outside, which is really the beauty of the museum and City Park. We first took the path northward, leading to a floating classroom. There was a marsh like area that had Adirondack chairs, so I made myself comfortable. There were sight glasses, where Kira did some turtle watching as well.

We then made our way back to the museum, and explored the southern portion, taking a bridge to the labyrinth.

The girls had more fun with the ducks and birds around the area though. Cries of “oh my he’s so cute, I want to get close to him.” Were heard more than anything else.

We then went back to our “house” and rested, and had dinner. We just had a big day. Children’s museums are always a big energy suck for parents.

We then made some plans for the evening. First up, dessert. The first place on my mind, Angelo Brocato’s. This place makes genuine gelato, and has since it first opened it’s doors in 1905. Thankfully it was just a few blocks away from the house we were sitting. Mid-City has everything you need I tell you.

There’s a marker on the door of how high the water level was during Katrina.

After getting our fill of sweets, we made our way over to The Broad Theater, on the recommendation of XY. A place that’s not even a thing around here, a theater with a bar. We watched Cruella and I had a beer.

It was a good day in the Crescent City. The Big Easy really wooed us, and we miss it.

A Friend Outside of Town

After our glorious evening at the Westin hotel in Huntsville, we headed due south with a destination of Montgomery Alabama. No, we weren’t there to see something about the Bus Boycotts, or any other historical site. We were simply there to see a friend outside of town.

That friend is Hank Williams, who is buried just outside of town.

The grave of Hank Williams, and his wife Audrey Williams.

For those who don’t know, Hank Williams is often times referred to as the godfather of country music. Before him was Jimmy Rodgers, the real question to me is who he passed the torch to exactly. Growing up as I did, one side of my family listened to old school country, where the other was all classic rock & roll.

You’re probably curious about the AstroTurf. The story goes that upon Williams’ death (which is a tale of the trouble with the life of a music star) fans would come to his grave and take blades of grass, to the point where no grass ever grew there.

In-between his parents graves, Hank Williams, Jr. (a country music star of his own right) placed a plaque asking visitors to be respectful.

Alan Jackson forever memorialized this spot in his song “Midnight in Montgomery.”

It’s actually the reason why the title of this post is “A Friend Outside of Town.” This song had a tremendous impact on my views of music that came before me, and when I really dug deep into the genre.

I had to take the opportunity to give personal thanks to a man who directly and indirectly impacted the way music has touched my life. Music that continues to impact people’s lives around the world.

We then continued on our way to New Orleans, where we spent the evening with my friends in their home. They left the next morning.

Space Camp

We were off for vacation, but decided to take it easy instead of my normal route of hard and fast to our destination. So we took a look at the map to see what was on our route. Huntsville, Al seemed like a good place to rest and they have the U.S. Space & Rocket Center, an excellent place to go for a couple of girls who are interested in STEM.

This is where the infamous Space Camp is held. They had lots of NASA and Space artifacts. It was a great place for all of us to start this whirlwind 25 day vacation.

A backup suit for Indiana’s own Gus Grissom

While here, I was blown away at the atmosphere of the whole area. Rocket and high tech companies surrounded us. It’s when I learned that my girlfriends father did a lot of work here, as he worked with the military and NASA on guidance systems for several different platforms.

Both of the girls had been here before, but I think this visit let them see the place in another light. I had never been, but I wanted to go to space camp as a kid. I think every kid my age did.

There is so much to do here that it’s quite easily a full day affair, especially if you participate in their camp programs. What really made my heart happy was the freakin’ Blackbird they have. That’s right, there is a SR-71 blackbird parked right out front.

I drooled over images of this plane as a child.

After a full day of this, we went off to find something to eat and then checked into our hotel. I decided to get us a Westin for the night. Everyone enjoyed, especially the room service. I wanted us to be comfortable for the day ahead of us. As we were then off to Montgomery and New Orleans. I was already exhausted from the days’ events.

A Vacation to Remember

I was finally able to be a man of my word to the man who gave me my first blog. When Amelia and I visited for a short period in 2019, I told him I would house-sit for him while he took his vacation, then a worldwide pandemic happened.

We spent 25 days out and about. Primarily staying in and around New Orleans, but making stops in Huntsville, AL, Panama City Beach, FL and Pensacola Beach, FL. We also took day trips to Venice, LA (on the Great River Road) and to Grand Isle, LA.

B has told me over the years that Louisiana during June and July is highly humid, I can’t remember the term he used exactly but it was meant as a warning. That said, now that I have returned – the peculiar weather conditions in the south are actually better for me than those of the midwest. I was able to do all the things there, where I cannot here.

I’m very confused at this point. This is the first part of many writings on this 25 day vacation.